My Blog is as meangingless as the Late Late Show With Craig Kilborn

Double The Poopage, Double the Fun

Jon says I used to have the most creative and superb emails back in freshman year of college. Freshman year, when I used to be stuck in "The Abyss" more commonly known as RI. I don't remember much from freshman year...it was very cold in RI, but I think that has more to do with the ridiculous amounts of "tasty beverages" I've had since then. My GPA freshman year was a sparkling 3.45, and man I thought I was hot shit. The "Ladiez" would come by and massage my head every night, and no not that one! Get your mind out of the gutter you filty animal(s). I say animal(s) because I think only one person reads this page sometimes. The a sucking sound ripped me back to NJ. At first I thought the sucking sound was Greg eating sausages, but then I found out that tuition was killing the bank accounts. I came home to find my land in disarray. Jon had ballooned up to 135lbs and had a facial hair, Greg didn't wear the Junior Seau jersey everday, and Chris...well Chris was smelly from rooming with Amar. Drastic action had to be taken, and this was the Irishman to do it. I said "Behold, the Irishman has returned!" and it was good. Our wild and crazy night from highschool were reborn...2 hookers, pah! Give us 4 hookers, no sharing for us! Wait that was MarioKart and it was 4 controllers instead of two, but details, mere DETAILS! Then there was the first summer at the shore, a place where any guy could get laid nightly. Unfortunately the bathroom mat (known as my chest hair) scared the women off yet again! I mean, I wouldn't want to make it with a monkey (ok, so we could thrown Jen in there, but again details!). Instead of loading up on beer, drugs, and skanky women, we loaded up on pasta and beans, Instant Messenger, and watching the shadow boxer at the gym. Alright I have to go to class...this is the first part of a story, a Great Story Known as The Lord Of New Jersey: Fellowship Of The Ass
Yeah, I'm a cheap asshole, who took my blog from the Derelicts and posted it here as well...well you know what I say to anyone who makes a big deal outta this: FUCK YOU