A BLOG THAT TIME FORGOT.....OR AT LEAST I DIDN'T KNOW BLOGGING EXISTED BACK WHEN THE EVENTS THAT FOLLOW ACTUALLY HAPPEN....
*start making Wayne's World's sound when they change the endings*

Ocean City, NJ circa 1999

This blog is from a beach house far far away, in a city full of white, white people. I'll set the mood. Jon, Greg, and myself are spending a summer at Greg's beach house. Greg and I work nights at fun little shithole of an amusement zone called Playland. Let me just say that if playing with rusting old amusepark rides counts as playing then the name of the place is accurate. Anyway, Jon had his current lady at the time down...she that must not be named. Since I had a method of transportation at the time and Jon didn't, I lent him my automobile...with a threat of a punch in the stomach if anything happened to it. So anyway, it's close to closing time at Playland when I get Jon Chain frantic phone call (no he didn't shit on himself while on the date), but Jon decided to leave my car unlocked after he and Mich...I mean she that must not be named, went inside. Unfortunately a craaaaaaaaaazy man decided that my car was actually his. Jon noticed that a man was in my car, so logically Jon decided to throw a shoe at my car....oh yeah and that shoe just happened to be mine! So not only would I lose my car but my kicks, yo! After probably wetting himself, he decided to call me at work 10 blocks away. Jon must have thought he was friends with the Flash, cause I don't know how I was going to rectifiy the problem from 10 blocks away! Anyway, after reminding him that OC police don't just break up drinking parties...I decided to run to the scene of the crime. By the time I got there, the cops were there and some homeless guy had moved into my car. After the cops figured out whose car it was, it was business as usual. Except I locked my car doors...